A month of marriage

Bismillah.

I'm suppose to blog about my wedding but I'll start with a month marriage life.

Alhamdulillah a month full of love, ADAPTING and SACRIFICE. As much as I prepared for it but in the end, when you go through it, you will know you boundaries and sabr in you. And pulak tu after 2 weeks of marriage hari raya haji, melalak berbakul2 aku first time hari raya tak dgn mak ayah. Luckily, A nak solat hari raya kat Alkaff, dpt solat with my mummy and balik rumah sekejap before going back to my MIL place to host for hari raya. It's different now as the youngest in the family and to host my abang2 and kakak2. Alhamdulillah to my SIL and BIL semua memahami, they are just a phone call away and they will be there help us with everything. And I learn a lot of A's characteristics, the other side of him that I don't know of. HAHAH.

Sajak lah tu, time2 hari raya haji or hari raya Qurban, jadi berQurban lah. It really hit me big time when the Khutbah mentioned about Qurban. Sacrifices. What kind of sacrifices?

Dah kahwin ni, sacrifices dia A LOT ye kawan2. Antaranya:

1. Masa dgn keluarga sendiri/kawan2
2. EGO and perasaan (in any decision making and whatever discussion that you guys are having)
3. Kepentingan diri sendiri (kirekan kene prioritise kat suami n org lain dulu dari sendiri)

Some people thought that it is any easy happily ever after, but think again. You are merging your lifestyle, your time, your hobbies and interest with another human being and his family. Bukan mudah we manage to get through it. Kite org perempuan ni mmg banyak sgt sacrifice tapi hanya Allah aje yg balas jasa kite kalau kite buat dgn ikhlas. My distant uncle advised me during hari raya before my wedding. He said:

"takpe, syurga tu guarantee awak yang punye, buat jgn merungut. lama2 suami pun tgk kesian especially isteri2 yg berkerje ni, makin sayang and give the leeway to it. Have faith in Allah."

Why he said that? because he is a husband to 5 kids and staying with his mother and his wife is working. He knows the feeling. He added kalau di tegur mak mertua, jgn amek hati, anggap mcm mak sendiri yg tegur. Sayang mak mertua mcm mak sendiri.

Ok enough of that. Now, I also want to talk about hak isteri. Banyak isteri2 tak tau yang mereka ni ade hak and takut dengan suami nye "kuasa mutlak". Memang suami ade kuasa and kite kene taat but tgk pada tempat and keadaan. For example suami suruh melacur or tak kasi pakai tudung, maka jatuh taat kepada suami or anyone else in fact. Okay, tu yg major ones, how about let say for example, husband tak kasi jumpa mak bapak kite? or paksa kite utk tinggal dgn mak bapak dia tetapi ade kemudaratan utk tinggal disana? Maka taat tu jatuh juga kerana dia memutuskan silaturrahim antara mak bapak perempuan and anak dia. 

Hak isteri adalah tempat tinggal, pakaian, makanan, nafkah zahir & batin. Ramai yg ingat kalau isteri dah kerje, takya ni semua. Kene still kasi. Lokek dgn isteri, rezeki di tutup tau. Yang isteri2 pun jgn nak sibuk: masak bukan tanggungjawab isteri, keje rumah bukan tanggungjawab isteri. Abe kalau kau duduk rumah tak buat ape, boleh lah mcm tu? Memang bukan tanggungjawab isteri tapi nak pahala, buat dengan ikhlas. Aku pun ade time2 malas tapi jangan amek kesempatan. Buat sama-sama. InsyaAllah lagi harmoni perkahwinan.

Perkahwinan tu indeed makes you more matured and learning the ropes on your own coz you can't seek any help from anyone else and by that even dgn your BIL/SIL pun coz everyone has a different set of stories, not everyone will have the same fixture of feelings and characteristics.

We didn't celebrated our 1 month anniversary of our wedding as we both find it too fast dah past by. Like, eh dah 1 month? We didn't prepare ourselves for a fancy dinner and presents. Maybe both of us are old married couple trapped in a youngsters' bodies. ahahah. Maybe next month?

Wallahu 'Alam.